Reduce Kid’s Summer Stress

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 Grandparents and other childcare providers often spend more time with young children in the summer when regular preschool is not available. Readers are asking for more discipline principles from Dr. Katharine Kersey to help them out. With her permission here are more of these tips to help maintain happy peaceful homes.

   Dr Kersey quotes J. L. Hymes, ”Discipline is a slow, bit by bit, time-consuming task of helping children to see the sense in acting a certain way.” To see her blog and books for families and teachers, search for her on the net.

Reducing Stress

   Connect Before You Correct Principle – Be sure to “connect” with a child – get to know him and show him that you care about him – before you begin to try to correct his behavior. For caregivers, this works well when relating to parents, too. Share positive thoughts with them about their child before you attack the problems!

  ABC Principle - Learn to think in terms of ABC (Antecedent, Behavior and Consequences). What was going on before the behavior occurred and what happened afterwards - as a result of the behavior? Many times you can find patterns in behavior - and alter your behavior or the circumstances that may have led up to the inappropriate behavior. Also, you might need to look at what is gained by the behavior - what the child is getting as a result. A child who is overly tired may throw a temper tantrum. In order to get him to stop, he may be given a toy. (In the future, he may throw a temper tantrum just to get a toy.) By changing the antecedent and/or the consequences, a temper tantrum may be avoided in the future.)

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   Ask the Child Principle - Ask the child for input with age in mind. "Do you think this was a good choice?" "What were you trying to accomplish or tell us with your behavior?" "What do you think could help you in the future to remember to make a better choice?" "How would you like for things to be different?" “How about drawing a picture of how you feel right now.” Children have wonderful insight into their own behavior and great suggestions for ways to make things better.

Bake a Cake Rule

  Bake a Cake Principle – When all else fails, bake a cake together (and eat some after it cools). It is a great way to stay connected and build happy memories.

Chill Out Principle – Sometimes it’s no big deal! Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill. This, too, will pass.

Divide and Conquer Principle - Separate children who are reinforcing each other’s misbehavior. Put adult between two children in a restaurant, religious service, or other venues.

Photos: Fran Darling fdarling fotos

More Ideas and Activities... See the authors’ book “Learning Through the Seasons” at area bookstores and grandparentsteachtoo.org. For more help to prepare young children for success in school see the authors’ web site: www.grandparentsteachtoo.org. Also check our audio Podcasts WNMU Radio 90; Youtube video activities; and join us on Pinterest.