Discipline that will make a difference in
children’s behavior is not easy nor is it a one- time event. Discipline that
works is a slow, bit-by-bit, time consuming task of helping children to see the
sense in acting a certain way. Readers have asked for more of Dr. Katherine
Kersey’s 101 Positive Principles of Discipline to create strong families and
reduce stress. They are shared with her
permission.
Follow Through/Consistency
Principle - Don't let the child manipulate you out of using
your better judgment. Be firm (but kind)!
Logical Consequences Principle - Teach
children that behavior has consequences. If they forget their jacket, they get
cold. If they don’t do their homework, they face the teacher and family’s
consequences. If their allowance is all gone, they don’t get a “Slurpee.”
Make a Sacrifice Principle
- Sometimes you have to forget your personal desires (talking on your cell
phone, watching a movie, doing your homework) and give full attention to your
children
Owning the Problem Principle – Decide
who owns the problem by asking yourself, “Who is it bugging?” If it is bugging
you, then you own the problem and need to take responsibility for solving it –
OR – you can opt to not let it bug you (and let it go), such as in sibling
quibbling!
Partner Principle
- Support your partner’s handling of the situation. If you disagree, move away
and let him/her follow through. Leave the room, if you are having trouble not
interfering. Do not negate or undermine the discipline in front of the
children. If you do, the children will lose respect for both of you. Later,
talk it over with your partner and let him/her know why you do not agree with
handling the situation.
Pay Attention Principle - Keep your
eyes and mind on what is happening. Don’t wait until the child is out of
control to step in.
Preparation Principle
- Let children know ahead of time what they can expect. (You will be able to
spend "x" amount of money on shoes and may have one drink at the mall.)
Prompt and Praise Principle – Explain
the expected behavior in a non-critical way and praise children as soon as the
behavior occurs.
Punt the Plan Principle
- In the middle of something that is not working – move on to something else.
De-stress yourself.
Positive Closure Principle - At the end
of the day, remind children they are special and loved. Help them to look for
something good - about the day that is finished and the day that lies ahead.
Parenting Awareness of Michigan will sponsor
a national speaker Dr. Deborah Gilboa “ Ask Dr. G” October 16 at the Holiday
Inn in Marquette, Michigan. She will
speak on the 3 R’s of Parenting: Respect, Responsibility, and Resilience. Register at preventionnetwork.org/pam
Photos: Fran Darling: fdarling fotos
More Ideas and Activities....See the authors’ book “Learning Through the Seasons” at area bookstores and grandparentsteachtoo.org. For more help to prepare young children for success in school see the authors’ web site: www.grandparentsteachtoo.org. Also check our audio Podcasts WNMU Radio 90; Youtube video activities; and join us on Pinterest
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