Gifting’s Last Step: “Thank you”

  “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues but the parent of all others.”  Cicero

Develop Awareness of Gratitude and Thoutfulness 

  Teaching children to be appreciative of others is an important goal. However, helping children learn to value the attention and gifts from others is a big task. It takes time and effort. To develop this awareness families can lead by being good models : saying thank you and writing thank you notes in front of them.

Encouraging “Thanks”

  As our children’s first teachers, families can encourage children to foster a sense of gratitude and to practice the art of being aware of the feelings of others.

Learning to be appreciative, to say “thank you”, “ I’m sorry “, or to give a compliment, can develop naturally over time as young children listen to the conversations of others.  By making the effort to explain why you are saying these things and by coaching kids to remember to respond politely, you are helping foster awareness of feelings and a habit of kindness.

Practicing “Thanks” 

Sending Postcards are Easy and Fun!

   Many children need some practice with an adult to counter the natural inclination to ask for more and more or to ignore or make hurtful statements about gifts they don’t like.  This situation is a perfect time to reflect about feelings, and to think about words or actions that make others feel appreciated.  Often, a quick phone call or Facetime session to send a “thank you” or “sorry” message is welcomed.

Writing “Thanks”

  As Albert Schweitzer says, “At times, our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person.  Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.”

While a verbal “thank you” or “please” is a good first step, many parents, friends or relatives are happy to receive a little card or note from a child. All you need are  paper, crayons or markers, and an envelope. Or, postcards are really easy to write and fun to sent! 

Reading List for Appreciation and Feelings

In a quiet moment, help your child think about a special gift item or perhaps a gift of time or attention.  Make it a little project to write or draw a picture, address an envelope, and send it off to the gift giver. An old card turned into a post card works, too. Very young children can draw and decorate, then dictate a simple sentence and print their name. Older children can practice their cursive, an important skill to be able to read the cursive of others across the generations.

  Some books about feelings, being thankful, and how can we help others to feel appreciated and happy include: “Lots of Feelings” by Shelley Rotner, “Feelings”  by Aliki, and ” The Thankful Book”  by Todd Parr. 

For more see grandparentsteachtoo.blogspot.com; wnmufm.org/Learning Through the Seasons live and pod casts; Pinterest, Facebook, You Tube since 2009

Photos: Fran Darling, fdarling fotos

Sharing the Language of Love with Children

Reassure Children - Say "I Love You"

  One of the greatest pleasures of reading to children is reassuring them that we love them speaking the words out loud.

  According to Dr. Gary Chapman counselor and author of the series of books the "The Five Love Languages” for all members of the family, we can never say the words enough. He writes about all the ways we can say the words so other will understand and be reassured they are loved.

Although each child is a distinct individual with a distinct personality and individual “love languages."  One or more might be more powerful than the others.  The key according to Chapman is finding out the love language what works best for each of our loved ones and then communicating our love in their language.

Love Languages

Five Love Languages

  Dr. Gary Chapman’s five love languages are affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.

  If a child thrives on words of affirmation here are a few ideas from Dr. Chapman. Post encouraging words, praise, or other kind words on your children’s door, in their mittens, or lunch. Compliment your children in front of others.

   Catch your children doing well or something good and thank them. “Thank you for doing your chores today without be reminded.”

   Look for strengths and notice their strengths. Cut up an uplifting note into pieces so your older children can put the words together. Text message words of affirmation to your teens, twenties, and older children often. Let them know when choices are intelligent, kind, and thoughtful, rather than only speaking out when there is a need to correct.  Say, “I love you” often.

Love Books

  When families read out loud to children starting with babies we share all five of the love languages.  Here are some beautiful books that help us speak the language of love.

Visit Your Library - Checkout the "Love Books"

“Take Heart, My Children: A Mother’s Dream” by Ainsley Earhardt ; “ That’s Me Loving You” by Amy Rosenthal;  “Love You Forever” by Robert Munsch; “I Love you, Stinky Face” by Lisa Mccourt; “Guess How Much I Love You” by Sam McBratney; “The Velveteen Rabbit” by Margery Williams; “Juggle Puppy” by Sandra Boynton; “The Wonderful Things You Will Be” by Emily Martin; ”Molly Spreads Love Wherever She Goes” by Suzanne Marshall; “Mama, Do You Love Me? “by Barbara M. Joosse; “What Do You Love About You?” by Karen Lechelt; ‘I’m Wild About You” by Sandra Magsamen; “You Belong to Me” by Mamoru Suzuki;”This is Our Baby, Born Today” by Nancy Paulsen; “Sometimes We Think You Are a Monkey” by Johanna Skibsrud; “Everyone Says Goodnight” by Hiroyuki Arai; “At Night” Helga Bansch

Photos: Fran Darling, fdarling fotos 

For More Ideas and Activities....See the authors’ book “Learning Through the Seasons” at area bookstores and http://grandparentsteachtoo.blogspot.com. Also check our audio Podcasts WNMU Radio 90; Youtube video activities; and join us on Pinterest